Why should a woman who is healthy and strong, Blubber like a baby if her man goes away? A-weepin' and a-wailin' how he done her wrong, That's one thing you'll never hear me say!

Charles Frederick Koehler

Laura Vance Buckner Koehler

Maggie Lucetta Kirkpatrick Spears and her husband, Tom Spears

So we aren't quite at the beginning but before the beginning.  Here's what we know:

  

THE SPEARS (Grandma Buckner's parents)

Tom Spears was born February 01, 1872 in Rookwood, Tennessee.  Maggie Lucetta Kirpatrick was born February 10, 1877 in Glory, Texas. They were married and had Elsia Oriella Spears on March 30, 1898. Although I haven't been able to trace history on the Spears side, Maggie's side is quite different.  Her ancestors, Moses Kirkpatrick Sr. and Jr. are listed in the Frank and Jesse James lineage website:  http://www.ericjames.org/html2014/fam/fam29616.html. A current day picture of their barn in Kentucky and their family cemetery is here: 

This website (which is now problematic) used to have a picture of the house which I cannot find now:  http://membersb.heritagesports.com/cgi-bin/fg.cgi?page=cr&GRid=24214537&CRid=74742& My recollection of the house was it was a really large log cabin that had been partly covered with siding.  Here's what this site (https://digitalcommons.wku.edu/mc_bldgs/28/) says about the Moses Kirkpatrick Barn: 

This structure is located .6 mile SE of the junction of Route 100 and Route 212 on Route 212 in the Vernon Quad. This is the barn on the site of the house of Moses Kirkpatrick, who moved from North Carolina, to Virginia, to Center Point, Monroe County. Here, he became quite the businessman within the realm of flat-boating. The original house, ca. 1790-1810, is the oldest of only three brick houses in rural Monroe County. Pictured are the double crib log barn and another outbuilding.

Here's another website with pictures of the graves there:  http://www.so-ky.com/cem/monroecem/k/kirkpatrick/kirkpatrick-idx.html  It sort of reminds me of the gravestones outside of an old church in the English countryside that mother and I visited--you could barely read the names and dates on the stones since they were so old. Here's an interesting history of Moses Kirkpatrick:  http://www.rootsweb.ancestry.com/~kymonro2/land/eastern.html  This is an application for the National Register of Historic Places--in it is a review of Moses Kirkpatrick (see page 4, on page 3 it sites that this is the same area that Daniel Boone explored): http://focus.nps.gov/pdfhost/docs/NRHP/Text/64500238.pdf.  Even more interesting is that there was mention in some of these about another early explorer, Thomas Lincoln, of that same area of Kentucky.  Apparently there is some debate about where Thomas' son, Abraham (later to become President Lincoln), was born--read here:  http://www.glasgowdailytimes.com/news/lifestyles/was-abe-born-in-monroe-county/article_84be00cc-d28b-5949-9f2c-1ebb53d2f698.html  More information on Moses here:  http://www.usbiographies.org/biographies/read.php?446,3341 and here:  https://geesnmore.wordpress.com/charles-gee-bridget-neville/children-of-charles-and-bridget/ However, there is some controversy about whether the Thomas Lincoln that is mentioned is Abraham's father or cousin:  http://digitalcommons.wku.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=2628&context=dlsc_mss_fin_aid  Several years ago, when I traced back Maggie's line in the Mormon website, I was able to find that she was a descendant of Elizabeth Woodville, the White Queen (but don't be too surprised--apparently a large chunk of English people can trace their lineage to her). Once I find the links again for that, I will place it here.

Our cousin, Marilyn Carr (Margaret and Bill Smith's daughter) has done some work on myheritage.com.  Here's information that she has on Maggie's background:  http://www.myheritage.com/site-family-tree-224586911/smith?familyTreeID=1&rootIndivudalID=1500017#!profile-1500095-info  

THE KOEHLER/BUCKNERS (Grandpa Buckner's parents)

Charles Frederick Koehler, was born in Germany.  He married Laura Vance Buckner and they had Marion Adolph on May 25,1896.  The story goes that when Marion turned 4 years old, Charles went back to Germany and was never heard from again.  Laura dropped her married name, Koehler, and went back to her maiden name "Buckner".  Laura was born December 12, 1876.  She was buried in Jellico, Tennessee.  When I looked for information on Charles, I found this on the myheritage site but couldn't access it:  https://familia.evemor.com/FP/genealogy-search-ppc.php?type=&action=person&siteId=224586911&indId=1500024&origin=profile

Here's what we don't know:

Why did Charles Frederick leave Laura?  What happened to him?  How did Laura view all of this?  Was she remarried?  It seems there was movement of the Kirkpatrick family from Virginia and/or North Carolina to Kentucky and then to Tennessee? What took the Kirkpatrick family from Kentucky to Tennessee? What took them from Tennessee to Oklahoma? I can't find much back history on the Buckner side of the family.  Perhaps someone knows more information?

For the title of this post, I turned to Rodgers and Hammerstein's lyrics to "Many a New Day" from Oklahoma.  I sort of think that Laura handled it that way but maybe not? 

On a personal note, one of my favorite heroines is Lucetta "Lucy" Honeychurch from E.M. Forster's novel, A Room with a View; so it seems somewhat befitting that is also my great grandmother's name.

If any one finds more information, I will be glad to post it here.  For now, you can place it in the comments area. 

Update 11/11/15:

Mom's former nurse, Joe, is married to Lori who I consider an expert at family history.  Here's what she found on Laura and Charles:

1880 census - Laura is in Kentucky

1895 - Marriage in Indiana of Charles Koehler and Laura Buckner

1896 - Birth of Marion Koehler/Buckner in Tennesee

1902 - Birth of Thelma Koehler/Buckner in Kentucky

1910 census - Laura is in Kentucky

1930 census - Laura is in Tennesee

1871 - Charles Koehler born in Germany
1892 - An Indianapolis City Directory lists this  (https://archive.org/stream/polksindianapoli1892unse/polksindianapoli1892unse_djvu.txt

Koehler Bros (Wm and Charles), meats 
453 Clifford ave. 
Koehler Charles F (Koehler Bros), b 246 
Keystone ave. 

1895 - Marriage of Charles to Laura
1899 - Charles is listed as a clerk in an Indianapolis City Directory: http://www.mocavo.com/Indianapolis-City-Directory-1899-Volume-45/350673/545 
He was also listed there in 1891:  http://www.mocavo.com/Polks-Indianapolis-Marion-County-Indiana-Directory-1891/117384/425
1900 census - Charles is in Indiana

1900 - Marriage in Indiana of Charles Koehler and Constance Granel (Saw spelling as Granel and Gravel....think Granel is the correct spelling)

1901 - Birth of Arthur Koehler:  http://www.familytreenow.com/records/census/koehler/arthur/jowp_aub_45sdewghh0tfq
1905 - Indianapolis City Directory https://archive.org/stream/polksindianapoli1905unse/polksindianapoli1905unse_djvu.txt
Koehler Bros (Wm F and Charles F), gro- cers 2122 E 10th. Koehler Charles F (Koehler Bros), h 911 Hamilton av.

1905 - Birth of Carl Koehler

1909 - Birth of Harold Koehler

1910 census - Charles is in Indiana

1914 - Birth of Herbert Koehler

1920 census - Charles is in Indiana

1930 census - Charles is in Indiana: http://www.mocavo.com/1930-United-States-Census/126213/004950628/302#row-30

Thelma being born in 1902 is odd.

Sheryl's note:  I found the same thing on Charles (but I couldn't see all the information).  Maybe he didn't make it back to Germany like everyone thought?

Update on November 17:  I provided some links to the things that Lori found and then I found this in a book called, "INDIANA AND INDIANANS" page 1685-1686 (ugh--it may be more than what we really want to know)  https://archive.org/stream/3868300/3868300_djvu.txt:

CHARLES F. KOEHLER is a well known 
Indianapolis merchant whose career has 
been out of the ordinary, both with respect 
to its experiences and its accomplishments. 

He was born in Saxony, Germany, Feb- 
ruary 12, 1871, son of Charles F. and Car- 
oline (Wirrgang) Koehler. In the -old 
country his father was a miller. In 1885, 
when Charles F., Jr., was fourteen years 
old, the family came to America and lo- 
cated at Indianapolis. Here the father 
learned the trade of carpenter, and he con- 
tinued to follow that vocation as long as 
he was physically able. He is still living 
in Indianapolis. His wife died here in 
1908. 

The second in a family of ten children, 
Charles F. Koehler had a common school 
education during his life in Germany. 
When the family came to Indianapolis 
they were in humble circumstances and 
Charles had to assume some of the respon- 
sibilities of providing for his own way and 
keeping the household in food and cloth- 
ing. The day after his arrival in the city 
he was sent into the country and secured 
employment on a farm for a man named 
Lucas. This farm where he had his pre- 
liminary labor experience in America is 
located on the Churchman Pike. This and 
other work busied him for two years, and 
then came the opportunity which he made 
the opening for his real life work. 

Mr. Koehler was put on the payroll of 
the Queiser Grocery House on Virginia 
Avenue as delivery boy and clerk. There 
was nothing about the store in form of 
work which did not come within the scope 
of his experience and his assignment dur- 
ing the next few months. But busy as he 
was in the day he helped to improve his 
education by attending a night school. 

Thirty years ago Mr. Koehler with his 
brother William opened the store at 2122 
East Tenth Street, and in that locality he 
has been ever since. His entire personal 
capital at the beginning was only six dol- 
lars. Having ability and some friends he 
borrowed two hundred dollars, and that 
was the foundation of a rapidly increasing 
enterprise which was soon more than pay- 
ing its own way and giving the brothers 
opportunity to discount their bills. They 
continued the partnership twenty-two 
years, when William withdrew. Since 
then Mr. C. F. Koehler has continued busi- 
ness alone and has a large and well 
equipped grocery store and meat market. 
His success is due to the application of 
fundamental business principles and eth- 
ics, and it stands out the more remarkable 
because at the start he was little more 
than a green German boy without even 
the ability to express himself in the Eng- 
lish language. 

In 1900 Mr. Koehler married Miss Con- 
stance Grauel, who was 'born in Wisconsin, 
daughter of Julius Grauel. They have 
four young sons, Arthur, Carl, Herbert and 
Harold. Mr. Koehler and wife are active 
members of the Butler Memorial Reformed 
Church. He is a member of the Grocers 
Association, and fraternally he has affilia- 
tions with Brookside Lodge of the Knights 
of Pythias and with Lodge No. 18 of the 
Independent Order of Odd Fellows. A 
few years ago Mr. Koehler bought a farm 
of eighteen acres near the city on Pendle- 
ton Pike, and this is the summer home of 
the family. Mr. Koehler is extremely 
loyal to the land of his adoption, where his 
opportunities developed themselves, and 
recently he has responded generously to 
the cause of this country's prosperity by 
investing heavily in Liberty Loan Bonds 
and Thrift Stamps.

1910 U.S. Census Charles F. Koehler Family, Indiana

Name origin http://www.familytree.com/surnames/Koehler: 

Koehler Family Name

A German surname which meant a man making charcoal from wood. In England just Lancashire county had Koehler families. Various spellings include Kohler, Kolar, Koelar, Koellar, Coler, Kolar, Coeler and Koelle.

Early Koehler families came to Pennsylvania to settle in the 1740s and 1750s. By the 1800s the Koehler families had mostly resettled in New York, Ohio, Illinois and Indiana but many remained in Pennsyvlania.